It Takes A Lot Out Of You, Proposing Does
by elenwyn
Summary: James has decided to propose to his long time girlfriend, Lily Evans, just before they leave school. Although, he might encounter a few problems as he's got nothing to propose with. He's lost the engagement ring you see.Complete
1. In which James has a minor problem

**A.N:** Shock horror! I've got another multi-chap fic up! It's quite amazing really...as most of my stories are one-shots. I hope you all like it, I think it's a bit different from my other things...give it a go and tell me what you think. When I posted "The Best Man's Speech" someone suggested that I do a story about the time when James proposed to Lily, so this is it!

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing that is entailed in this story; only my insane imagination and a notebook to write it all down in.

* * *

Oh Merlin…

Oh Holy Merlin and all the Gods of Quidditch have mercy on my soul…I am a dead man walking.

I, James Harold Potter, have done the most stupidest thing **_ever_** in the history of all time **_as we know it_**.

I've been with my girlfriend, the most fantabulous girlfriend in the world I'll have you know, for a grand total of seven months, a personal best, and I've decided to propose to her. I mean, there's really no-one else I can see myself growing-old-and-grey-until-our-kids-get-fed-up-of-us-and-dump-us-in-an-old-people's-home with, but her.

But I know for a fact that that little fantasy will probably now never become reality.

As I've lost the engagement ring.

I don't know **_exactly_ **how it happened. It's not like I'm a forgetful person generally….Well, apart from that incident where my doting parents purchased a hamster for my seventh birthday, which I adored for approximately a week and then completely forgot about due to the fact that the new Nimbus broomstick had just hit the shelves of Quality Quidditch Supplies.

Needless to say, I haven't had such a high maintenance pet since.

But this is ridiculous! My girlfriend's engagement ring is **_not_** a hamster which I didn't feed for a month! It's a symbol of my undying love for her!

I **_must_** find it! I have exactly a week until we graduate from our seventh year in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and I want to propose to her before we leave.

Exactly a week in which I have to ransack every inch, every speck, every minute bit of dust that lurks underneath beds and in between bookshelves for that_ **dratted**_ piece of jewellery!

Oh Gods…a week to propose…seven days…one hundred and sixty eight hours…

I better get started…

* * *

I've been scratting around like a hen in the Common Room for around half and hour now and there's_ **still**_ no sign of it!

My "Best friend", notice the inverted commas, Sirius Black, is just leaning against the portrait door, clearly highly amused that I've lost the ring, which is also a very valuable piece of jewellery that's been passed down through my family for generations…

Oh Good** _Godric_**, add that to the growing list of reasons why I won't live to see the end of the week. My mother is going to massacre me when she finds out! I had to practically beg her to owl it to me in the first place!

Sirius is now chuckling merrily away while I practically dismantle one of the squishy armchairs in my bid to find the blasted thing….He won't be laughing when I blackmail him to help me…Mwhahaha…I love being Head Boy, so many up-sides….

"I hate you Prongs."

Sirius is now, for the first time, living up to his name. I suppress a laugh as he emerges from the fire-place, absolutely covered in soot.

Sirius **_Black. B_****_lack_** as coal, get it? …Eh, Lily did always say that I had a strange sense of humour…

"Padfoot…**_why_** in the name of _**Merlin** _did you decide to look up the _**chimney** _for the ring?" I ask, ignoring the mock-me-and-I-kill-you-and-feed-you-to-Hippogriffs look.

"You **_told_** me to flipping look everywhere!" He bellows out, "And that's what I'm bloody well doing!"

I laugh and he throws a pillow in my direction, which I catch with ease, "I mean…it's a **_ring_**. Don't count the fact that your mom will murder you when we get home-" I visibly wince – "and tell me honestly: Is Evans **_really_** worth the trouble?"

"Am I really worth the trouble for **_what_ **exactly?"

* * *

**A.N: **Dun dun dun! That's the first chapter done and dusted. I'm going on holiday later on today (5pm British time) and I won't be back until next Saturday...so that's when the next update'll be. Drop me a line and tell me what you think!


	2. In which James does some Smooth Talking

**A.N:** Whoo! Next chapter up! And I had a fan-bloody-tastic time on holiday:) Sorry it's a little late in coming, didn't get back home till late Sunday and school exams are on this week.

**Disclaimer**: You think I could actually _own_ any of this? Pfft...you need to check into St. Mungos matie...

* * *

I freeze where I'm standing, as does Sirius, who had been trying to rub the soot off his face. Turning around slowly, I come face to face with the very person I'm going through all this trouble for:

Lily Marie Evans.

Doesn't Lily Marie Potter sound so much better…?

**_Argh!_** No James, she'll never be your wife unless you **_find the damned engagement ring_**! Quick! Think up a reasonable excuse!

……..

"Erm…Hi…Lils…Erm…." I manage to stutter out, waving manically to her with an insane grin on my face.

Great…**_excellent_**…absolutely bloody brilliant… Damn you instant reflexes! Damn you! **_Think _**before you act! **_Think! _**

Lily raises her eyebrows in curiosity, a small, amused sort-of smile gracing her features. I grin nervously and my eyes dart to any other part of the room but her, making me look rather mad I presume.

Behind me Sirius coughs. I think he swallowed some of that soot.

"**_Well_**?"

Oh dear…she sounds rather annoyed. I dare myself to look at her.

"Well what, my dearest Lily-petal?"

Yes! Score for me, I sound like my usual; charming self…I'm **_so _**good at covering up my feelings.

"James, you **_know_** I hate the name 'Lily-petal,'" she answers, sighing and flicking a piece of her beautiful red hair from her eyes.

Damn it, I could have **_sworn_** she loved that name.

"And I was talking about what I heard when I walked in," she finishes, staring me in the eye, only to be distracted by the sound of Sirius choking, "…What on Earth…Sirius, **_why_** pray tell are you covered in **_soot_**?"

She blinks; looking puzzled….Oh how sweet she looks when she's confused….

"And why are you dismantling the Common Room?"

Oh **_Gods_**, yet another thing to explain away.

"We were…Erm…we were…" I rush over to my friend, who is doubled over and coughing harshly, "I mean…**_Sirius_**-," I hit him on the back heartily, an idea forming in my-oh-so-brilliant mind, "- was trying to see if he could fit up the chimney…"

Oh dear, is that **_really_** the best excuse you can come up with Prongs?

"Up the **_chimney_**?"

Lily doesn't believe me, I can tell she doesn't. She's got that sort of don't-tell-me-lies-otherwise-we're-over-Mr.-Potter-and-I'll-hex-you-into-next-week look on her face.

Did I mention she can be quite the intimidating young woman?

"Erm, yes!" I nod, hitting Sirius again, who'd probably hit me back was he not having trouble with his respiratory system right now, "You know what the boy's like…mind of a small child."

She still looks unconvinced, but she's letting it slide; probably because she's going to torture the truth out of me later.

I'll be sure to invest in a bodyguard to ensure that doesn't occur.

"Alright…" She sidles over to me and gives me a quick peck on the cheek, which immediately sets my insane grin off again.

I instinctively pull her closer to me; it's still a miracle that I've been able to get her to like me after all these years, and I frequently ask one of my friends to pinch me a number of times to make sure I'm not dreaming.

"Nuh-uh," Lily wags a finger in front of my face disapprovingly, squirming out of my grasp, "I only came in here to get my books, and you still haven't answered my question."

Oh bugger. I thought she'd forgotten about that, and it looks like the method of torture for today is to not let me within 5 inches of her.

I think Lily must have a book in which she writes "The Many Ways to Drive James Potter to the Brink of Insanity."

"But…but I already answered your question, my little Flower,"

Surely she doesn't mind me calling her **_that_**, right? I'm sure I've called her that before…

Sirius and I exchange nervous glances as Lily lets out an exasperated sigh and crossed over to where her bag is sitting. There is a mad gleam in my best mate's eye; and I realise with horror that he is going to blurt out the real reason any second.

"No, you haven't," my girlfriend states matter-of-factly as she bends down to rummage through the contents of her bag, "You're just trying to cover up whatever it is you're hiding with cheesy nicknames…"

Hmm…What's the best way to strangle Sirius without Lily realising..?

I contemplate that thought for a few minutes, only to be bought back to reality when Lily places her hand on my face, looking at me with concern in those sparkling emerald eyes of hers,

"You're obviously preoccupied, I've been talking for the last five minutes and you haven't heard a thing, have you?" She smiles softly and kisses me gently on the lips.

…Maybe she won't try to massacre me after all…

"I'll see you at dinner, ok?" she murmurs as I pull her into another hug, except that this time she doesn't try to escape. Whoo!

"And I know you're acting a bit mad…"

Mad? If she'd lost the thing she was just about to give love of her life and her best friend was threatening to let the proverbial cat out of the bag, I'm guessing she would be more than mad.

She would be hysterical.

Hysterically mad.

"James?"

Ooops…tuned out again…

"Sorry Lils…just thinking that's all," I mumble, not needing to act sheepish.

"Don't forget about our date tomorrow night," she says firmly, "You said that you wanted to talk to me about something important, I can't wait to find out what it is!"

With that, she bounces off with books in hand, leaving me with my mouth hanging open in startled shock.

That's a thing….can shock actually **_be_** startled?...never mind…

Sirius has collapsed onto the disembodied chair in a fit of laughter.

Oh how I do hope the cushions devour him.

Slowly.

Very, **_very_** slowly.

So slowly that…Well…You get the picture.

"Now you're going to have to come up with another excuse!" he manages to splutter out, "Oh boy, this'll be rich…But of course, I could always tell Red what's **_really _**going on…"

He waggles his eyebrows dangerously. I consider re-instating the position of Best Friend to Remus.

"You**_ dare_**, and I'll let Wolf-boy eat you next Full Moon," I threaten darkly, causing Sirius to let out another sharp bark of laughter,

"As **_if_**, Horn-head, he'll never be able to…Hey!"

I leave Sirius in the Common Room and stalk off in the direction of the boys' dorms to find something.

Or rather some**_one_**.

Wolf-boy.

Why didn't I think of it sooner!

_16:03pm_

_Couldn't find Wolfie in the dorms. Will check the library. _

_20:27pm_

_Missed dinner as I got lost in Library. Got bitten by several books, shouted at by scary librarian and ernt a glare of girlfriend as I missed dinner, and as a result, missed sitting next to her. Still couldn't find Wolf-boy. _

_My life is reaching an all time low. _

_23:45pm_

_Given up hope on finding Wolfie. He must've emigrated for the Winter. _

_Haven't found ring either. Bollocks. _

_Think I'm beginning to lose sanity as well. Double bollocks. _

_Will tie Wolf-boy up tomorrow and interrogate him as soon as I get the chance._

* * *


	3. In which James is inadvertadly screwed

**A.N:** Thanks for the reviews everyone! I've got to admit, the only reason I can update is because I spend most of my revision lessons writing. And I revise of course. Or rather...I _**ponder**_ the idea of revising...

**Disclaimer**: I don't own, so don't sue. Thank you:)

* * *

I'm going to die….I'm going to die… **_I am going to die_**!

"Prongs, do stop pacing up and down," an exhausted looking Remus peers down from his perch on top of a pile of books.

I eventually found him. He was sleeping. Unfortunately for both of us I didn't realise that fact as I jumped on the nearest bed -his- to drown out my sorrows in a pillow.

My facial features will never be the same again.

I turn around to glare at him, wincing as any facial expression I try to make causes me great pain.

I shall have to remain an expressionless zombie for the rest of the day.

Oh the joy.

"What am I to **_do_**!" I finally blurt out, stopping so suddenly it shocks my little werewolf friend right off his perch. Hah.

"I've already told you what to do," the ashen haired boy grumbles, picking himself up from the floor and rubbing his head where a book fell.

Good. Now he can suffer pain as well.

Revenge is sweet.

"Just **_calmly_**," he emphasises the word as if he's talking to a five-year old. What does he think I am, an imbecile?

"-explain to Lily the truth about what's going on, and about your weird behaviour yesterday-"

"But that would mean telling her I want to--" I cut myself off before checking around to see if my girlfriend's in the vicinity.

She's not. Thank Merlin.

"-To….**_join with her in a Holy union_**." I whisper, winking at Wolfie so he catches my drift.

Peter, one of my other friends, looks up from practising chess manoeuvres with a look of mingled horror and shock on his face, "You mean…you want to…do…**_It_**?"

He puts rather a lot of emphasis on that word. Far too much.

"**_No_ **you plonker!"

Remus gets me! He always gets me. Why isn't he my best friend?

"He wants to pop the question. But he's lost the ring, so he can't."

Scratch that. He practically blurted out to the **_entire_** Common Room about my situation!

A few people begin to giggle.

I glare. Which causes pain. So I stop. But it's enough to send them packing. So there.

"That's not good…" Peter answers, turning back to his chess-board.

He has the sense not to laugh. Perhaps he should be my new best friend.

"No…it isn't," I reply through gritted teeth, "And Wolfie? Your advice is crap. It really is."

"Numero uno," Remus begins to count things off on his fingers, "My name is not **_Wolfie_**, not **_Wolf-boy_**, not **_Choccie Devil_** and **_not_** **_Mr. Boxer Shorts_**. Don't ever call me those, for I shalt not answer."

Peter and I exchange looks. Well I'm not going to be the one to tell Padfoot he's been deprived of his favourite nickname! I look back to Remus, he's still talking. **_Godric_** the man can go on…

"But I **_do_** answer to Remus or Moony. Nothing else. Numero Dos: If you don't like my advice, don't take it or ask someone else. Now, if you excuse me, **_I've_** got a Potion's essay to write."

"You've got ours as well!" Wormy and I both shout together, before laughing as Remus turns a decided shade of mottled red.

Oooh…He's an angry werewolf.

"I guess that's a 'no' then?" Peter asks as out touchy little friend stomps off to the haven of the library.

Really. It's a haven. It's the only place you won't catch Padfoot dead in.

"Looks like you're inavertedly screwed Prongs."

I stop myself from making grasping gestures at Wormy's throat. I'd almost forgotten about my problem! And I say as much.

"Wormtail, your words have been about as much help as a burnt tea-cosy prancing around on Slughorn's nose."

Alright. So I allowed myself a little poetic licence. Sue me.

I glance at my wristwatch.

Oh **_bugger_**.

**_5:00_**

_**It's 5'o clock and I was supposed to meet Lily and four!**_

Oh damn, damn, damn and **_damn_**!

She'll be cursing me with the fires of a thousand suns!

I really don't want to be on the receiving end of her first Unforgivable. It would hurt too much.

Why is everything in my life going wrong!

The Gods are out to get me. Why! **_Why_** I say!

I need to get a move on if I don't want to be burnt to a delicately fine crisp….I bet Lily's already thinking up ways to disembowel me slowly and painfully…


	4. In which James gets dumped

**A.N:** Whoo! Next chapter up! Sorry if it's a little short...I haven't had the best of weeks so this is as much as my muse could come up with. Hope you like!

_**

* * *

**_

List of things that have turned my life into a Living Hell

**1.** Lost engagement ring. Never a good sign. (I've talked to Frank Longbottom about this: could be a bad omen?)

**2. **Lousy best friends. One is holding me under blackmail, the other gives out crap advice and the last one is just clueless.

**3. **Temperamental girlfriend. She's a red-head, obviously.

**4. **Tying into **No. 3.** Temperamental girlfriend will kill me as I'm an hour late for our date. I'm the worst boyfriend in the world.

**5. **Post-exam-stress. Only **_now_** have I realised that the N.E.W.Ts we sat two weeks ago are vital to our future.

Looks like I'll be slumming it in Knockturn Alley then…

But let's get back to **No. 4.**

My imminent death.

* * *

I race down corridors like a mad-man, knocking innocent firsties onto the ground as I pass. Madame Pomfrey will be pleased; she's been complaining that she hasn't had enough sick people.

**_Gulp_**. She's waiting. At the bottom of the stairs.

Alright James, breathe. Just calmly walk down the stairs…that's it…smile…wave…**_NOT THAT MADLY YOU PILLOCK! _**That's better…

**Apologise. Now.**

"Lily…before you decide which form of torture would be most painful…let me just say…"

"No," she answers shortly. She's angry; her bright eyes are ablaze with fury. Oh Merlin save me.

"There's been something up with you since yesterday. I don't know what's gone on, but suddenly you've been ignoring me, avoiding me, and, what's worse; being an **_hour_** late for our pre-arranged date."

Her wand begins to twirl dangerously in her hand, a sure-fire sign that she's in a mood **_not_** to be messed with.

I pull at my shirt collar nervously; as well as the rage in her eyes there's also disappointment and hurt.

Something hit me then. And this time, I don't mean literally.

She thinks I'm going to break up with her!

"…And I can't help but…**_See_**! You're doing it again!" She throws her hands up in exasperation as she realises I've tuned out again.

I can't help it! It wasn't programmed in my genetics to be able to multitask!

She folds her slender arms across her chest, her dark-red hair flying around her, "James, you've just proved to me that my suspicions are right."

Oh damn. No, no, no…no, no, no, **_no_**! Why isn't my mouth trying to stop this from happening? Say something already you idiot, quick! Don't just stand there and let this happen!

"And let me tell you, **_Potter_**…"

Oh err…last name basis. Not good.

"Look, Lils…"

Yes! My voice is finally working!

"I think you're-"

"I don't give a flaming Puffskein what you think!" she says angrily, "I've guessed it. You want to split up with me." Her emerald eyes begin to sparkle with tears.

Oh Lily…don't cry…**_please_** don't cry…I'm a man, I can't handle the situation when you cry!

"So I'll save you the trouble."

And she was gone. She'd run off up the stairs faster than you could say, "Quidditch," and she's just left me standing here, trying to process what's just taken place.

"…"

Wait a minute.

Lily just split up with me.

Lily. Just. Split. Up. With. Me.

Oh **_Hell_**.

* * *

I mope into the Common Room, glad to see Lily isn't there for once. But my friends are. **_Excellent_**.

"Whoah Jim-boy, you look like Christmas has just been cancelled," Sirius comments as I sink into the sofa besides him, letting my head fall into my lap.

"Yeah, Harrods can't deliver," I grumble, using the punch line to a joke from a Muggle T.V. programme that only Remus gets the meaning of.

"Come on then, **_Margo_**, what's troubling you?" the said boy teases, chuckling.

He stops when I raise my head.

"Mate, what happened?"

The three of them are genuinely concerned now. They probably haven't seen me this down since the end of last year when…never-mind.

"Lily's finished with me," I murmur sadly, bringing my head back down to my lap.

All three of them are silent. Peter's eyes are wide, Sirius is shaking his head and Remus has a pensive look on his face.

I think he's probably on the same wave-length as me.

How in the name of bloody Merlin am I going to get her back?

* * *

**A.N:** Right...if anyone can find out, or knows already, which T.V show quote "Harrods can't deliver" comes from, I'll give you cookies. Virtual cookies obviously. Of the chocolate-chip variety. There's a clue in what Remus calls James...but I don't think many people will get it. Or maybe you will. I don't know. 


	5. In which James has a Snapeish encounter

**A.N:** When was the last time I updated? Must've been a couple of weeks now...I'm so sorry guys but, you know how the end of school can get. Luckily I break up at the end of this week for 8 weeks, so I'll have a lot of time on my hands to finish this. A big big **_big_** thank-you goes out to MarauderMischeif, who helped me through a bad patch of writer's block, and finished up this chapter for me. So the end bit is all written by her. Thank you!

**Disclaimer**: Do I own this? I think not...

* * *

All hail the absolutely bloody brilliant power of irony.

Really, it's a God-send.

No sooner had Lily informed me that we were no longer romantically involved, the ring turns up.

Typical.

Peter found it this morning, rolled between a pair of Sirius' socks, to make matters worse. I'll have to disinfect it before presenting it to my girlfriend.

Oh wait. I don't actually **_have_** a girlfriend anymore.

Bugger.

* * *

"Honestly Prongs, you really are a first-class pillock," Sirius informs me as we finish playing a game of Quidditch – it's the only thing that'll take my mind off of the searing pain that is my heart breaking into tiny pieces.

"First you have the girl, lose the ring and lose what's left of your sanity. Then you have the ring, lost the girl and…well, you've never had any sanity to put it bluntly mate."

I make a rude gesture in his direction and try to hit him on the head with my broom. He ducks, but then hits his head off the back of the broom as I swing it back.

Idiot.

"I'll get her back," I say, much more confidently than I feel; it's Wednesday now, and we leave school on Friday. If I haven't patched things up with Lily by then…I don't even want to think about it.

"Sure you'll get her back…" Heh, Sirius is my inner voice, you see? He sounds like I feel…if that makes any sense. Maybe that's the reason I chose him as my Best friend…

"Let's picture the scene, shall we?" He gets in front of me, walking backwards across the grounds to the castle door with his broom swinging madly in his hand, "In one corner, there's you all pleading and begging, dropping the ring trying to make up with her."

I growl threateningly, clutching my broom-handle tighter in case I feel the need to hit him again.

"And in the other corner, there's a very angry red-head who will hex your arse to Timbuktu and back before you can even start the first syllable. Oh yes Prongs, I can practically **_hear_** the wedding bells."

He lets out a bark of laughter as I swing for his head again. Sirius decides it's best to flee lest he feel my wrath and begins to leg it up the hill, "Make sure I'm the Best Man!" He shouts, "…If you're still alive for the wedding o'course."

With one last mad cackle, he disappears, leaving me to vent my frustration by kicking the grass multiple times, causing tufts of it to be wrenched out, and throwing my broomstick on the floor, breaking a few of the twigs as I do so.

And who should walk by then…but Voldemort's top slimy git himself:

Snivellus Snape.

"What's wrong Potter? Have your friends finally purchased some common sense and abandoned you?"

"Shut it Snape," I mutter darkly through gritted teeth. I'm trying not to be provoked, really I am.

It's one of the things I had to do in order to go out with Lily, not to raise to Snape's bait.

But it's becoming increasingly difficult not to.

"What? No witty comeback? You surprise me Potter."

The git's drawing his wand; he's obviously up for a fight. Well I'm not going to give into him; not this time. I've got bigger things to worry about.

I begin to turn away from him, facing once again in the direction Sirius scarpered off to just minutes before. Oh if he were here now things would be a whole lot easier…

"Don't turn your back to me."

Something sharp presses in between my shoulder-blades and I freeze, grasping my own wand from my robe pocket.

Looks like the greasy-haired bugger's finally acquired a back-bone.

I get the urge to say that aloud, but the voice that's the opposite to Sirius's voice – I'm going to call it the Remus voice – stops me, saying not to let Snape get to me, not to let him win by realising I'm angry…Not to hex his stupid, hook-nosed face off…

"Not going to attack, Potter?" His voice is quiet, almost a whisper, but I can catch every word he is saying.

"What is there to attack?" I reply with a sneer, turning to face him. "You're already so ugly there's no use in trying to hex you."

I'm sorry, Lily... I just couldn't resist. My face is the face of **_evil_**!Pure, rolled up evil. Sort of like the evil beneath Sirius' bed.

I turn and begin to walk away, feeling satisfaction as I glance at the look on Snape's face. With anger, comes great ugliness.

Not that it wasn't always there.

As I walk away, though, something feels out of place; a rush of air behind me grows steadily louder and louder. I turn around-

A blast of red light knocks me off my feet. The next thing I know, I'm slammed into the castle wall and falling to a heap on the grass.

Snape makes his way over wearing his usual sneer. "There's not going to be much to attack when I'm finished with you, Potter," he mutters threateningly. As he raises his wand, everything dims, sucking my consciousness into the darkness.


	6. In which James gets two major shocks

**A.N:** I think I've got my writer's block problem sorted out now. And I also think that there's about..what? 3-4 chapters left in this story? If I've got my time-line right it'll be late Wednesday night...which gives me one-and-a-half days in Marauder time for me to finish this off...yeah, I'd say around 3 or 4 :)

**Disclaimer:** Nope, I don't own it. I just write about it.

* * *

I wake up to the sound of voices whispering not too quietly around me, and I groan as a wave of bright light makes it extremely difficult to see properly.

The voices stop abruptly, and I thank the Gods because at this point in time I've got a splitting headache.

"Bloody Hell! Prongs! You're alive!"

So much for the quiet.

I groan again as I feel a heavy weight sink into a corner of my bed, and I try to open my eyes properly to see who it is, but find my vision obscured and blurry.

Damn; where's my glasses…

"Padfoot, I think Prongs would rather **_not_** appreciate your weight on top of him at a time like this…"

"Oh shush Wolfie, what do you know? He could like it after all."

I can feel rather than see Sirius move his eyebrows suggestively, and I groan again, lifting my hand up rather feebly to swat him away.

"You see?" I can hear Remus saying from the other side of me, "I'm always right in these sorts of situations, but no, you insist on -"

"Where is he? **_Where is he_**? I'm going to hex that arrogant, blundering, stupid little git **_so_** hard…"

Uh-oh. I recognise that voice anywhere…

"Look Evans, Snivelly's already done that enough – "

"Oh just **_move_**, Black!"

I hear I shove and suddenly there isn't a weight on the bed anymore, Sirius presumably landing on the floor. If I squint slightly, I can just make out a huge flame of red hair amidst the haziness.

Yup, that's definitely Lily.

"You awful, ignorant little **_toe-rag_**!" There's a ringing noise in my ears as my ex-girlfriend decides to slap me soundly across the face.

Ouch…as if I haven't already had enough physical damage done to me today…

Notice that my friends aren't coming to my rescue. Oh no; they're too scared of Lily to even try. I mean, when she got into a row with Martha Denby that time in second year…

"You got me so bloody worried about you, you horrible **_prat_**!" At the end of this comment, said ex-girlfriend flings her arms around my neck and buries her head in my chest, whilst I look at my friends – or rather look at the blurs which I presume are my friends – in a state of disbelief.

"Erm…" I manage to say my first words since the incident with Snape, and my voice sounds horse, like I haven't used it in years,

"Not that I'm uncomfortable with this Lily…but could you get off me? There's a rather unpleasant pain shooting up my chest which is hurting even more now you're on top of it…"

She nods quickly and sits up, grabbing my hand and clasping it in hers. I'm slightly scared at this point in time. One minute Lily hates me to the point of loathing, and then she slaps me – quite hard if I do say so myself – and then she's being all girl-friendy?

Girls, honestly. Sometimes they're worse than Moony on PMS.

In the background I can vaguely hear the sounds of Remus arguing with Madame Pomfrey about how long visitors are allowed to stay in the Hospital Wing, and, by the sounds of it, our little furry friend's winning the argument.

I blink a number of times, the need to be able to see my ex-girlfriend-who-hopefully-is-now-my-girlfriend-again in a little more detail than a red and grey blob with green dots. Sensing my need, Lily lets out a small chuckle and places my glasses over the bridge of my nose.

Hallelujah! I can see once more!

And now I can also see Sirius making very strange gestures behind Lily's back…What on Earth is he trying to mouth?

Get…the…ping? Get the **_ping_**? What in the name of Godric has that weirdo been smoking?

…Wait…

I get it!

The **_ring_**! Get the ring!

Of course! Now would be a perfectly good time to propose to my darling little Lily-flower. (Although I've learnt now never to call her that in person.)

I carefully rummage around my trouser pocket, trying not to cause myself any more pain in the process.

Upon finding that pocket empty, my face blanches, and I hurriedly check the other pocket to see if the ring has been placed in that one.

"James…what are you looking for?"

My head shoots up quickly and collides with Lily's, who had been bending down to my level to help me. She lets out a yelp of pain and I apologise repeatedly whilst holding my own head in my hands.

Sirius looks puzzled. I glance up at him forlornly and shrug, causing him to roll his eyes in amazement.

I swear this has got to be the most unlucky week of my life…

The ring must've slipped out of my pocket when that git slammed me against the wall.

I've lost it; again!

Bloody Merlin….


	7. In which James gets utterly confused

**A.N:** Yay! I have an update for you! Sorry for the little wait; my beta had to send the finished copy back to me, so here it is!

* * *

…_Bang…Bang…Bang…Bang…_

"Mister Potter, would you kindly refrain from hitting your head on the bed-post. It will only result in prolonging your stay."

I groan loudly against said bed-post, trying in vain to will the hospital bed to snap from underneath me, resulting in my untimely extermination from this horrible, **_horrible_** world.

It is Thursday afternoon. Yes, you heard me; Thursday afternoon.

Do you know what that means?

Correct. It means that I now have less than twenty-four hours in which to:

**A. **Find the engagement ring.

**B. **Propose to Lily

**C. **Wipe Snivellus Snape from the face of the planet.

…Ok, so maybe the last one is optional, but it would feel **_so_ **good right now…

"Mister Potter! What have I just said?" Madame Pomfrey bustles over in her usual matron-like way, prying me away from the bed.

I let her – reluctantly, safe in the knowledge that at least the Hospital Wing has windows that one can fling themselves from.

As she gives me a check up- I swear I've had at least twenty since I woke up this morning- I wonder how everything in my life has gone completely and utterly wrong; and why the Gods are so dead set against me.

….Ugh…I need advice…and not the crap stuff a certain werewolf gives out. No, I need **_real_** advice, something that will **_assist_** me.

"_Life's like flying, son. There's always going to be ups and downs."_

Dad…

He used to say that to me all the time when things went wrong. Well, he was right, wasn't he?

Apart from the fact that my life feels like I'm flying with one leg tangled around my broomstick while it hurtles at 100mph into a stone wall.

But other than that he was spot on.

If Dad were here I'd get proper advice…he always knew exactly what to do. I mean, Merlin, he got into as much trouble as I do!

I think that's where I get it from. Maybe if I'm lucky it'll be a recessive gene and mine and Lily's children won't be cursed with the Potter bad luck.

Dad, I beg of you – and I know you're probably finding this situation an absolute hoot from up there…or down there, or where-ever you are. But seriously, I'm begging you; give me a sign or something!

Point me in the direction of the ring! Or Snape!

"Yes, yes…move him over here…" Madame Pomfrey seems to have left me ages ago, with no indication – to my knowledge – that I can go. I mean, honestly – **_wait a minute_**.

Snape.

Those professors have just bought Snape into the Hospital Wing.

Dad, thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you! I knew your advice would be better than Moony's, I just knew it.

The professors leave briskly and I inconspicuously hide behind the screen next to the greasy git's bed, waiting for Pomfrey to stop fussing around him.

When she finally goes, I have to stuff my hand in my mouth to stop myself from bursting into laughter. Snape's now sprouting tentacles all over his face, all unceremoniously glowing ghastly colours.

Sirius must've got him. Good ol' Padfoot.

"Stop your sniggering Potter; you're not looking to peachy yourself."

"At least I don't resemble the offspring of Voldemort and the Giant Squid." I laugh, before getting down to business.

Snape was the only person around me when I lost the ring. He **_must_** have stolen it!

"Now Snape – not that I don't want to take this opportunity to hex you into tiny pieces, I just haven't got the time. I believe you have something that belongs to me."

Snape blinks slowly, his eyes following the movement of his little octopus friends, "And **_what_** would I possibly want to take that's been in your hands?"

"A ring." I reply, trying to match his stony expression, but finding it's becoming increasingly difficult to do so.

"Why would I want a ring?" Snape sounds incredulous.

Suddenly, he's staring at me with such intensity that I begin to feel uncomfortable. So uncomfortable in fact that the room begins to spin. I frown; about to tell him to look away under pain of death when he stops, and the room rights itself.

"I haven't seen that pathetic ring for that Mudblood of yours," he spits out coldly.

I manage to restrain myself from grabbing his throat and throttling him slowly. Lily is **_not_** the M-word.

Wait…how did he know? I never told him…I would never tell him anything like that…

I open my mouth to ask that very question when the grease-ball cuts me off.

"Checked your robe pockets lately?"

My brow furrows. Now this is making no sense at all.

"Wha-"

"**_Mister Potter_**! I said you could leave ten minutes ago! Shoo! I have patients to attend to!"

I send the school matron a death glare while her back's turned. Couldn't she see I was in the middle of an interrogation?

I grab my school robe and wand, the action making me think of Snape's words again.

How in Godric's name did he…**_know_** about my proposing plans? And what was that gibberish about my robe?

He probably slipped a Biting Teacup or something into it while I was out cold. Yes, that's it. I'll check it later. Right now I need to find Lily, tell the other Marauders about this little revelation and get food.

I hope I haven't missed Dinner…

* * *

**A.N:** Right, just a little note...I think there's going to be two more chapters; so the next one will be the penultimate one if I planned my notes out right. Just thought I'd let you know. Hope you enjoyed this chapter! 


	8. In which the Marauders plan pranks

**A.N:** Sorry for the wait guys...ugh bad week this week. Anways, this is the penultimate chapter to "_Proposing", _and I hope you enjoy it. The next chapter should be up in a day or two. :)

--------

Well, so much for discussing things with my friends.

Overjoyed as they are to have me back among them, it seems the topic of the nigh is how to: 'Go-Out-With-the-Biggest-Bang-Hogwarts-has-ever-seen-and-make-McGonagall-scream,' or 'GOWtBBHhesamMs" for short.

You can tell Sirius thought of the name.

"We could literally _blow up_ the school!" Sirius suggests, his eyes gleaming like the maniac he is.

A first year student sitting nearby suddenly loses his appetite.

"_No_." Remus answers firmly, making Sirius pout.

"Pads, you look like a girl," I laugh, "Oh, and you'll never guess wha –"

"_How about_," Peter pipes up, leaving me with my mouth hanging open, narrowing my eyes at our chubby friend.

"How about," He seems undeterred by my glare, getting rather excited as he bobs up and down in his seat, "We turn the Great Hall into a…a…_giant Chess board_!" He finished dramatically, his arms wide open.

This doesn't have quite the effect he's looking for.

"…"

Simultaneously, the three of us burst out laughing, leaving Wormtail to shuffle moodily in his seat, "Just a suggestion…"

The poor boy will never learn.

"Look, now we've got that out of the way, I need to –"

"James!"

I begin to grip my fork extremely tightly in my hand.

Lily bounds over and hugs me, her arms going around my neck.

….I suppose I can't stay _too_ angry at her.

"I'm so glad you're out! I knew you wouldn't want to miss your last meal here."

I nod a 'mhm', actually wanting, for the first time _ever_, for her to go away. Not because I don't enjoy her presence. Oh no.

But if she gets wind of us planning a prank for the last day, she'd go spare, and we'd end up hanging by our toes in the Dungeons.

"Anyway, I have to go. Alice and I are helping to clean out the Common Room."

With a quick kiss on the cheek, she disappears, and all four of us exhale heavily.

"If she'd noticed…" Sirius begins.

"I know, mate, I know." I murmur in reply, "Now, as I was trying to say a few minutes ago, som –"

"_I'VE GOT IT_!" Sirius yells, jumping up onto the bench.

The entire Hall goes quiet, staring at him. I can see Remus putting his hands to his face in despair.

"_Mister Black_. Get down from there this instant!" McGonagall's voice rings out from the Staff table.

"O'course, Minnie m'dear," Sirius shouts back, winking in her direction, "Sorry for the outburst."

He jumps back down and the other students gradually go back to their meals.

"This better be good," I hiss.

"It _is_!" Sirius assures us all.

Remus and I exchange doubtful glances. Peter grabs some more roast chicken.

And so he begins to tell us of his 'wonderful' plan, amid our many exclamations.

"…Are you sure that isn't classed as treachery to the Crown?"

"Mate…that's _brilliant_!"

"Could you pass me the bread rolls?"

I'm giving up trying to tell them about the Snape incident, I get talked down every time I try. So I'm just going to figure it out by myself.

…By tomorrow evening, I'll be a dead man.


	9. In which James finally proposes

**A.N: **Here's the last chapter of _Proposing_. Thank you so much for all your reviews, and for all your comments. I hope you enjoyed reading this story as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Unfortunately, I recieved some bad news yesterday. On a website I take part on,we found out we lost one of our members, a truely unique person. Although I only spoke to her a couple of times, she touched me. I'm proud to say that I knew her, albeit breifly. I dedicate this last chapter to her, with the hope that she is happy now, where-ever she is.

R.I.P Hannah, you will be missed dearly.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing you see here, apart from the plot.

-----------

"Have you managed it?" Remus and I ask together as we sit down at the table, where, shock of all horrors, Sirius is actually _reading the newspaper_.

"…Sirius?" I venture, "When did you start reading _The Prophet_?"

"More importantly, when did he actually learn to _read_?" Remus adds on, his eyes wide with disbelief.

Peter is still struggling to get his trunk into the hallway.

"It's a cover!" the newspaper-head-of-Sirius answers, "So no-one suspects anything."

"_I'm_ suspecting something and I know what's going on," Remus snatches it away, folding it into quarters for his own reading later, "Now, did you manage it?"

Sirius pours honey onto his pancakes, "Yes."

Remus and I grin, as Peter waddles over, out of breath, and sits down with us.

"What did I miss?"

---------

"Ready?"

"Ready."

"Affirmative."

"What?"

I hit Peter on the head, which he rubs, glaring.

Sirius sighs, "…Alright, _Sonorous_."

His voice magnifies over the bustle of students in the court-yard, saying their good-byes and getting ready for the carriages to take them to the station.

"Excuse me; can I have your attention please?"

The crowd turn to look at the four of us, standing on the ledges of the stone arches to get a good view.

"In around thirty seconds, you will have to clear a space in the middle. We don't want you to get squashed now, do we?"

Sirius' eyes are twinkling. I can tell he's enjoying this.

My eyes scan the crowd for Lily. She's trying not to look intrigued, but I know she's wondering what's going on.

"_Black. Potter. Lupin. Pettigrew._ You have not graduated just yet. Step _down _from there immediately and –"

Whatever Minnie was going to say is drowned out by the sound of marching coming from the castle. Everyone stares.

One by one, every suit of armour in the school marches out into the courtyard, forcing anyone that hasn't already moved back to do so.

Lily clambers up next to me, "This better be good," she mutters in my ear.

I grin, inclining my head to tell her to watch.

The knights begin to form a pattern:

**MWPP**

Sirius wipes a fake tear from his eye. Remus is wiping a real one away.

"Now," Moony says next, his voice magnified like Sirius' was, "If our jolly school choir could sing for us…"

At this point, Sirius and I dash behind the arches, ready to light Filbusters' Fireworks when the time is right.

As if controlled by an invisible conductor, every Slytherin starts opening their mouths, singing to a tune I don't think many of them even know before now:

"_Godric save the Marauders,_

_Long live the Marauders,_

_Godric save the Marauders!_

_Send them victorious,_

_Happy and glorious,_

_Long to keep pranking us!_

_Godric save the Marauders!_"

The Slytherins, especially Snape, who still has purple marks on his face, do not look too pleased about it, but we don't care.

One the count of three, the fireworks are released, magically charmed to be seen in the daytime, and the crowd cheers and claps; including McGonagall.

I knew she loved us really.

------

Now, we're five minutes away from King's Cross, and I've got the ring tightly clasped in my hand.

I decided, grudgingly, to do what Snivelly says for once and checked my robe pockets. There it was, as bold as brass.

Stupid git. I hate it when he's right.

Sirius, Remus and Peter are playing Exploding Snap, whilst Lily is asleep on my shoulder.

I guess I'll have to wake her up, although she does look gorgeous just sitting there.

I run a hand through her hair a couple of times, "Lils? Lils, wake up, we're almost there."

I'm going to propose to her at the station. I don't care how many people are watching, I'm going to propose.

Merlin, I've never felt more nervous.

She stirs and I move my hand.

"We're there already?" she asks sleepily. I nod, smiling.

The train pulls to a stop and we all grab our things, all three Marauders wishing me luck.

Sirius saying as he pats me on the back, "If she does say no, there's always Moaning Myrtle."

And I'm considering _him_ as my Best Man.

"Lils! Wait! I shout, turning a few heads. She turns around, her expression questioning.

I get down on one knee in front of her, making her eyes widen, "James..."

I raise my hand to stop her talking, "I…I…"

Wait a minute. The ring was in that hand.

Oh Holy Hippogriffs.

…I can do this without the ring…I'm sure I can…

"Well, Lily, I know we haven't been together that long, and I've lost the ring, so I haven't got one for you to wear…but I wanted to know if you…if you…"

She's actually paying no attention to me, trying instead to get a knot out of her hair.

"Lily, I'm trying to propose!" I exclaim, not believing my eyes, "You already look pretty enough, can't that wait a minute?"

She carries on regardless, pulling something shiny out of her hair.

I decide to ask her anyway, "Lily, I love you like…like…like the most someone can ever love something. Will you marry me?"

Lily looks down at me for a moment, and then at the thing in her hand, "Is this it?"

"What?"

"Is this is?" She holds her hand out.

There, resting in her palm, a few of Lily's auburn locks still stuck to it, is the ring.

"Well bugger me…" I mutter, staring at it.

I look up to her to see her eyes gleaming with tears, "This is why you've been acting so strange."

She pulls me into a hug; making no other inclination that she heard my proposal.

When I pull away however, the ring's on her left hand, and she's smiling at me, "I hope you don't lose anything else anytime soon, or the wedding's going to be a disaster."

I can't help myself then, I kiss her, overjoyed that she's actually marrying me.

Me!

She'll be Lily Marie Potter.

…Or Lily Marie Evans-Potter, either or.

My friends are cheering behind me, and I can vaguely hear Sirius muttering something about Firewhiskey, but all I'm really focusing on are Lily's emerald eyes locked onto mine.

Merlin, what a week.

I think I'm going to lie down now.


End file.
